The Friendships That Actually Save You..
The Friendships
That Actually
Save You
Black History Month
Celebrating legacy & those who built it — together
Valentine's Day
Love in all its forms — not just romantic
Ash Wednesday
A reminder of mortality — and what matters most
Random Acts of Kindness Day
Feb 17 — and why it should be every day
We just spent the last week of Black History Month celebrating legacy. Ash Wednesday reminded us we're mortal. Valentine's Day came and went. And somehow, through all of it — we still don't talk honestly about the one relationship that can carry you through everything.
Not followers. Not associates. Not the people who like your posts.
Black History Month
Taught Me This
We spend February honoring icons — Harriet Tubman, James Baldwin, Maya Angelou, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. — and rightfully so. But here's what we don't talk about enough: none of them did it alone.
Harriet Tubman had a network. Baldwin had his circle in Paris that kept him writing when the world wanted to silence him. Dr. King had John Lewis, Ralph Abernathy, Coretta — people who held him together on the nights history didn't see. Maya Angelou had James Baldwin himself, and she openly credited their friendship as one of the great forces of her life.
Legacy isn't built in isolation. The icons we celebrate had people — imperfect, loyal, present people — who told them the truth, showed up in the dark, and refused to let them quit.
That's friendship. And if you don't have that, you need to ask yourself why.
"Legacy isn't built in isolation. The icons we celebrate had people who told them the truth, showed up in the dark, and refused to let them quit." — Pure Mindset
02 · Ash Wednesday Hit Different This Year
Someone pressed ash on your forehead and said: "Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return."
That's not morbid. That's a gift.
Because the minute you remember you're not here forever, you stop wasting time on shallow connections. You start asking harder questions — Who actually knows me? Who would I call at 2am? Who tells me the truth?
Lent is about stripping away what doesn't matter. Apply that to your friendships. What relationships are you maintaining out of habit — not because they're actually feeding you?
What February Is
Really Asking You
Valentine's Day gets all the attention, but February is the month that asks the deepest question about love across all its forms. Romantic love. Ancestral love. Spiritual love. And the love between friends — which, if we're honest, is the love most of us have taken for granted the longest.
Think about this: you will likely spend more of your life with your closest friends than with a romantic partner. Friendship is the longest relationship most of us will ever have. And yet we put the least intention into it.
We plan dates. We work on marriages. We go to therapy for family trauma. But when's the last time you were intentional about your friendships?
04 · Random Acts of Kindness Day Exposed Us
February 17th. Every year the internet floods with posts about holding doors and buying strangers' coffee. And that's sweet.
But here's what bothers me — why does kindness have to be random?
We'll buy coffee for someone behind us in line but won't check in on the friend who's been quietly struggling for months. We perform kindness for strangers but forget the people right in front of us.
The most powerful thing you can do is make kindness intentional, not random. Text your friend for no reason. Show up with food. Say "I've been thinking about you." Do it on a Tuesday in March when there's no holiday to prompt you. That's when it counts the most.
The Uncomfortable
Truth
Some of your friendships have an expiration date you've been ignoring.
And some of the people you've been calling acquaintances? They've been trying to be your friend for years.
This is the week to get honest about it. Not in a dramatic, burn-everything-down way — but in a quiet, intentional, I'm going to stop sleepwalking through my relationships kind of way.
"Some of your friendships have an expiration date you've been ignoring. And some of the people you've been calling acquaintances have been trying to be your friend for years." — Pure Mindset
Here's what I want you to do this week.
- 1 Call one person you've been meaning to call. Not text. Call. Hear their voice.
- 2 Have one real conversation — not about surface stuff, but about how you're actually doing.
- 3 Tell one friend what they mean to you. Out loud. Don't wait for a funeral or a crisis to say it.
Legacy Is Built In
The Quiet Moments
February is almost over. The ashes have faded. Valentine's Day has come and gone. But the question remains —
Who are your people, and are you actually showing up for them?
